By: Anne Pessi
“Please don’t burn them. Right now we don’t know anything, after all they don’t talk. And nobody has been harmed yet, not even our regular paintings. So don’t panic, and don’t hurt them just because you might be scared or worried.”
Some words age like a nice cheese. A stinky one, you know the one… blue, sometimes fuzzy… and very pungent. This is a statement from our previous article on the issue and you may be asking yourself now, ‘What’s this got to do with us Anne?’ Are you blind? Do you not leave your commons? I’m pretty sure even if you did you’d still know, THEY’RE HERE! PANIC! RUN! BURN THEM ALL!!!
Or not. ((As my editor has just now told me not to create chaos and she signs the checks… I mean not literally, we’re all broke, you know?))
In all seriousness, we’ve gotten reports of the Skeletons jumping out and attacking students now. They’re leaving their portraits, appearing around corners, and when you’ve disposed of them they leave a pile of bones for you to clean up. Even worse, manual labour at the hands of their BONES.
A Skeleton every so often, doesn’t sound tooo horrible right? Good kick to the knee, they’re down and out? You’re wrong, oh how you are very much wrong. These bags of bones only go down after you’ve used magic against them and not with a bloody beater bat! There’ve Gryffindors spotted carrying beater bats around the school, word is, this angered the skeletons and now they’re showing up in droves! They’ve infiltrated the common rooms and let me be the one to tell you, the loo? Not safe!
Bottom line is, they’re here and they’re worse than we imagined. Someone, go find out from Ser Lorelei why they’re here and what we can do to get rid of them! Now, let’s hear some student testimonies on the matter.
“I feel like they’re watching me sleep, just waiting for the moment I need to wake up and use the loo… you know? Isn’t there a wizard we can call that exterminates Skeletons?” – A Gryffindor
“ I saw this one guy rap away a Skeleton? Does that even work? Can we just talk to them then or is violence the only answer?” – A Ravenclaw
“I say there’s something evil at the root, you know, like the hag? She’s come back for vengeance and sent these Skeletons ahead to soften us up for her own old bones. Makes sense doesn’t it? There’s doom every year at Hogwarts, why would this year be any different?” – A Slytherin
“I beat one up with it’s own arm! Don’t tell Nora… “ – A Hufflepuff
There you have it, Testimonials from each house on what’s going on. What do you make of things? Are you going to write home to ask your mum to come pick you up and take you out of Hogwarts? Or Are you going to wait it out and fight with the rest of us?