by J. Rothenberg
A dragon has been spotted over Hogwarts several times as some professors continue to insist classes be held outside despite that. The dragon has been noted to be a Hebridean Black, which are known to be super territorial. So it’s best to steer clear of the forest even more than we already do. We all steer clear the forest anyway normally, right?
Sightings of the dragon began roughly two to three weeks ago when it was witnessed as a shadow flying over the forest. Students gathered by the caretaker’s hut to try and figure out what was going on. Professor Morrigan and Professor DracheBlume were on the scene saying wonderfully comforting things like it was fine and there wouldn’t be any danger. Because dragons certainly aren’t dangerous or a cause for panic it seems.
Later that week noted idiot Willow Barton was seen rowing out of the castle on a boat in a notably moronic move. The loch however is very big and empty. Everything on it can be seen from the castle- and the forest it seems as the dragon came forth to nearly eat the Hufflepuff. From what I’ve gathered through various eye witness reports and the latest gossip, Almeda Peyroux ran up to the dragon and both students were nearly eaten. A crying shame.
The dragon was spotted several more times such as during Care of Magical Creatures when Professor DracheBlume set us up as a lovely all you can eat spread for our scaly friend. Luckily no one was hurt, but it certainly was a scare. Unless you’re Gryffindor madman Evan Adams, sixth year, who was cited claiming he wanted to “eat the dragon” and was noted to be longingly watching the sky from the courtyard of the clocktower.
Rumours and speculation have begun that the Dragon is secretly Professor Osbourne Mason who used a rare animagus form to disrupt Hufflepuff quidditch practice, leading to the slaughter on the pitch last month. Of course, this is silly and unfounded in any fact, but it’d make sense, right?
Now as I did with the Dementor article, here are some safety tips for surviving an encounter with a dragon:
- Don’t try punching it.
- Run away.
- Run faster than Arthur Letsworth or Willow Barton.
Now here are some actual serious tips for avoiding attracting the dragon’s attention:
- When outside, avoid casting flashy or loud spells.
- Try to avoid taking food with strong scents outside, especially around the caretaker’s hut.
- Don’t fly your broom about the school grounds, especially near the forest.
- Be mindful of prefects and professor’s advice when told to move to a new area or go inside.
Maybe with these fine tips you too can live to see the New Years because in all seriousness anyone being eaten by a dragon would suck- even if we do joke about it.
