An open letter to all Slytherins…
Once again the emerald hourglass reflects the fewest points and our noble house is being seen as the laughing stock of the entire school.
Before those so prideful of their familial inheritance commence to yowling like tone-deaf banshees, take note of the following information:
- House points are reflective of behavior. This is a simple fact that we are given on the very first day of our education in this institution. Positive behavior is reinforced and negative behavior is punished.
- Thus far, the great house of Salazar has been acting in a manner most unbecoming to young adults. Indeed, many of you have been acting more like spoilt children throwing themselves to the ground in fitful tantrums after being denied the latest broom or trinket from Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes. As such, I feel that I must address this behavior by treating members of my own house as I would such recalcitrant miscreants (ie “dunderheads”).
- Need I remind you, ladies and gentlemen, we are in school, not only to learn to use our remarkable gifts but in addition, we are required to learn to co-operate with those who may have vastly differing viewpoints and philosophies from our own. Stated simply, Hogwarts is the “Real” world in microcosm. You simply cannot afford to forget that. Certain members of the previous generation did not follow this simple advice and they paid for it. Learn from their mistakes. DO NOT repeat them.
In closing, I can hear the shocked and mortally offended intakes of breath even now as I put quill to parchment. I must say, it amuses me, gives a shot of caffeine to the old thinking machine, as it were…and before you even think of hexing, pranking, or otherwise wishing me ill, dear siblings, remember this:
- I am, as the byline states, a Prefect
- My Mum is a retired Unspeakable–which means, to put it bluntly, Don’t Even Think About It
Exasperatedly (and yet, still fondly) Yours,